Getting Away from It All

Hi, folks!I write to you as a changed woman, rejuvenated throughout my mind and soul. You see, I’m fresh off the wondrous experience known as a vacation. And although I do quite a bit of travel—for work, family/friend visits, or weekend getaways—I haven’t taken a real vacation in a very long while.My friends, let me tell you: vacations are magic.I realize this is a very privileged stance to take, considering the time/money alchemy necessary to get away for an extended period of time. But if you can take a vacation, then do yourself a favor and start planning one. And if you can’t, I’d urge you to scrutinize your budget and figure out a saving strategy that’ll put one on the horizon for you, no matter how far out it is. We'd been hoarding money and airline miles for more than five years in order to fund our own recent journey—and clearly that patience paid off. Looking forward to a future trip is a psychological reward unto itself.Everyone’s got their own ideal dream vacation, and this was basically mine: four days in Barcelona and three days in Rome. Doug and I hit a few museums and other tourist attractions, but for the most part we just walked, exploring and soaking in the experience. We ate paella on a covered patio in a downpour and cacio e pepe pasta in the courtyard of the Vatican (and we drank an unquantifiable amount of wine and cava/prosecco). It was the best thing I could’ve possibly done for myself. There's a certain amount of anxiety inherent to an impending trip—the biggest being will it be worth it?—and I try not to think too much about expectations so that I don’t end up being disappointed. But now that it's over I’m so grateful for how well it went, start to finish. Even the flight home offered up a hilarious-to-me wordplay joke.The novelty of being away made it unusually easy for me to forget about work and everything else that was stressing me out before I left. Visiting cities where English isn’t the dominant language is especially therapeutic, I think. Using Spanish requires a different kind of thought about what I’m trying to say, along with the best way to say it (especially given how much my conjugation skills have atrophied when it comes to more esoteric verb tenses). In Italy I had to resist the goofy yet powerful urge to speak inexpert Spanish at people, and when I finally switched over to English I had to consider the clearest way to make myself understood—staying away from idioms and needlessly complicated constructions that would inevitably confuse non-native speakers. There are so many different ways to convey the same thought, and I relished the opportunity to rewire my habits of verbal communication, rethinking my language and amping up my reliance on tone, facial expression, and gesture.If the trip had a downside, it would be that Doug came down with a cold the first day in Rome (a cold I’m now battling, as I marvel at the fact that he managed to walk all over the city despite being sick). But that too resulted in an unexpected gift: when we sought the counsel of an English-speaking pharmacist, she inquired if he had a “dry cough or a—” she paused for a second before finishing with “—fat cough.” And now, “fat cough” will be in my vocabulary for the rest of time.Moments like that are delightful to me, and I got to enjoy a bunch of them over the course of the trip. I also learned new things, such as: MTV dubs its Jersey Shore–style reality shows into Italian (what a job that must be for the voiceover actors!). Plus, you know, arts/culture/history stuff. There’s so much more, and I should cut myself off before this just turns into a travelogue. But if you’re thinking about going to Barcelona, Rome, or anywhere in the general vicinity, feel free to write to me for advice. I’ve got a ton of newfound knowledge regarding European travel that will evaporate before I have a chance to use it again, so it might as well benefit somebody.And of course, lest ye forget, you can and should send me your work-advice questions too! I know what I’m tackling for my next column, but the installment after that is up for grabs. Just hit reply on this email if you want to get in touch.Even though I got home a week ago, I still feel like I’m cocooned in a travel-induced bubble of calm. I don’t even mind being back at work—after an extended period of concerted leisure, it feels good to be productive again. (It probably doesn’t hurt that, thanks to jet lag, I’ve been falling asleep ridiculously early. I don’t know how long it’ll last, but it has been nice.)I’m still catching up on stuff I missed while I was traveling—realistically, I’ll probably be catching up forever until I accept that it’s a lost cause—but I did see the news that The Billfold has started fundraising to keep the lights on. I’ve been a Billfold fan ever since it began in 2012 (thanks to some email archaeology I can verify that I signed up for a commenter account just a couple weeks after their first post) and I really hope it continues to thrive. You can contribute to their Patreon if your budget can handle it, or else show support in other ways: turning off your ad blocker when you visit the site, sharing articles, and helping recruit new readers.Relatedly, RIP to The Awl and The Hairpin, beloved blogs joining The Toast in that great internet archive in the sky. (I didn’t link to The Toast because their archives are down right now, but they should be reappearing eventually. Anyway, back to the topic at hand.)In addition to all the other quality stuff they publish, The Billfold has been home to Dear Businesslady since 2016. My latest column is about dealing with jerkish micromanagers (and, correspondingly, managing your own time so you’re not providing ammo for their nitpickery—including some bonus advice for professional writers). Right before that ran, I did a Friday Chat with Senior Editor Nicole Dieker in which I shared a tale of communal-laundry-machine woe. You’ll probably also like this discussion about out-of-office messages and email availability—a subject near and dear to my heart. Speaking of which, shoutout to my day job for being so good about enforcing a healthy work/life balance. I got to spend uninterrupted time with family and friends over the holidays, and I was able to disconnect completely during my vacation. I wish everyone could be so lucky.I don’t usually do resolutions, but my goal for 2018 is to care less about stupid bullshit that’s a waste of energy—and so far it’s off to a great start. May you all be similarly successful at separating yourself from your stresses and enjoying the heck out of whatever downtime you can finagle. Happy (belated) New Year! ~court, AKA Businesslady PHOTO TIME!I have approximately eleventy bajillion pictures from my trip, but picking just one to share is surprisingly easy. Here’s the interior of the Sagrada Familia, the iconic Barcelona cathedral that’s been under construction for over a century (although to be fair, that includes an extended hiatus under Franco’s dictatorship). There’s #NoFilter on that shot, and all of those colors are completely analog—just the sun shining through stained glass. The entire space is like being in a magical rainbow forest, and if you have even the slightest inclination to visit Spain, I cannot recommend it enough.